Change: Not for everyone

Why do people and organizations move or change their affiliations from something they apparently believe in, only to join a new organization or location and work to change that org/location to match what they left?

There is a mindset that I continue to be confronted with that I just can't understand. Perhaps that is due to my nature of being logical and reasoned and I just can't comprehend this alternate view.

A few years ago, we met our new neighbors who moved 'to the country' from a much more populated area. They said they looked forward to the open fields, safe environment, lower property taxes, well-respected school system and 'easier way of life'. Shortly after they finished un-boxing their earthly possessions they began complaining about the lack of service. The young couple started complaining about trash service - you need to contract for your own service, that we needed sidewalks for strollers, that the police should routinely patrol the area. The neighborhood in question resides on an old horse farm with 20 MPH speed limits and 1-10 acre home sites and I can't remember any crime being committed since I moved in 11 years ago. This same couple were the first to contact the county and complain about the increase in their property assessment and demanded it be reduced as they did not wish to pay any more than what they were already paying. How exactly did they think the county would pay for the existing services - let alone the new ones they were asking for?

On a related note, I have been a part of youth sports in the area for several years. First, as a parent and coach and then on to the administrative side (league coordinator, coaches training, authoring policies ....). On two separate occasions, neighboring sports programs have had difficulty maintaining their programs and deferred families to our programs. As soon as we enrolled the new players and the seasons began to start - the former programs started making demands that 'our' program change to reflect the existing of 'their old' program. From 'adding a patch on the sleeve' to show the heritage from the older program to demanding that we change the guidelines for how teams are formed - WE NEEDED TO CHANGE TO ACCOMMODATE their wants/needs.

A friend of the family moved to a very nice, convenient location in the area. The convenience of the area did have a price and that was it is difficult to get out of the neighborhood at certain times of the day due to the amount of traffic that passes the entry. I recently heard them complaining that a traffic light should be added to ease the flow in and out of the neighborhood.

My children attend private school. Specifically, they attend a Catholic school. We, as a family, made the decision to invest time and treasure to insure the best (in our eyes) for our children. Others have made that same decision and I applaud them for it. There are those (and I have heard them loud and clear) that are offended that their child must attend religion class ... IN A CATHOLIC SCHOOL. I respect that they are not of the catholic faith but they did elect to send their child to that very school.

Lastly, when we moved in to our home we sought out the opinions of our neighbors prior to any projects. There was no law that said we had to do so, and the county I live in is very much a proponent of property rights. We had never had a conflict with any of our ventures until very recently. I hand carried a letter to my neighbor (newly moved in to the area) explaining an upcoming project. I respectfully requested any feedback on our plans and that we would listen to any/all concerns or questions but that the project was on a short timetable due to demand in the market. After a week of no feedback, I contacted the contractor and proceeded to start. Immediately, I received the call requesting a work stoppage until they could verify concerns they had with the county office. We (my family) had been to the county 3 times on permits and restrictions to insure there were no legal issues with what we had planned. Other than informing us that she did not want us to execute the project - there were NO comments regarding what our plans were. Nope, it was 100% about stopping the project and no 'middle ground'. In the end, the county backed us up and said we still have some rights in this country and county.

So, what to do? Why is it that new organizations or people moving in to a functioning society/group/area are free to dictate that the existing functioning group must change to adapt to the new tenants? Why is it that it is wrong to request and/or expect others to conform to the area they are moving to?